Renewal
by AcerbusEquinomin56
Summary: Falling in love with an abusive, ill tempered presence is usually seen as a mistake, but in Ryou's case, it might just be his freedom. Tendershipping.


Valentine's Day Morning. It was a time when love was in the air; when commercialism flared its head of vivid color; when there were as many happy and excited people as they were miserable and utterly groaning people, wishing that they didn't have to get out of bed to face another day of sappy idiocy. It also happened to be a day when Bakura was in the hospital. Or more specifically, a bed in the hospital.

Bakura sat, disgruntled, in his uncomfortable hospital bed dressed in his even more uncomfortable hospital gown. The room didn't scream luxury. The walls were white, sterile and illuminated by what was thrown through the large, overbearing window nearby. There were a few chairs sitting about as well as some standard furniture, but otherwise, the room was pretty much empty. Except for Ryou who happened to be sitting in one of the chairs.

There was a dull set of silence filling up the room. Ryou had come to check on Bakura and Bakura was in no mood to be cooped up in a hospital when he felt there were other things for him to do. He couldn't name any of them upon questioning, but the ones that escaped him certainly were worth considering.

Bakura groaned.

"I don't want to be here…"

Ryou looked up from his hands and calmly asserted his opinion.

"It's better that you are here, though."

"Better for whom?"

"Better for you."

"I bet…"

At that point, the doctor entered the room. He was a taller man, balding, with a curved nose that almost overlapped with his lips. His eyes and chin were both small, and nestled comfortably in his face. He wore a white doctor's smock and khaki pants, and stood on dress shoes. He seemed rather unimpressive.

"Hello, young man! I have your test results back!"

"Oh, joy…"

Ryou frowned at Bakura. It was a little early in the morning for sarcasm. The doctor however apparently did not notice, or if he did, paid no attention other than to apply his own brand of discrete sarcasm.

"So glad to hear your enthusiasm! In any case, the results are not quite as bad as they sound and you've nothing too large to worry about."

"Great. Could you hurry up? I don't want to stay here any longer."

"Bakura!"

The doctor chuckled.

"That's perfectly understandable and especially on this fine day! I bet you have a special sweetheart waiting for you somewhere."

He hummed to himself happily, ignorant of the murderous look settled into Bakura's face. Ryou tried to speed the process along.

"So, are the results good then?"

"Oh, yes, quite good, considering."

"What are they?"

"Well, our lovable patient here has pneumonia."

"What!"

"Yep. Thankfully, we caught it before it could develop any farther, so he should be perfectly fine relatively quickly. It could have been much more serious."

"But, it still sounds serious."

"Oh, it is. That's why we're keeping him overnight again just for further precautions."

This time Bakura intervened.

"What? You've got to be kidding me..."

"Well, it's not yet time for April Fool's, so no, I'm afraid you will have to stay for the next night. We'll check in on you tomorrow, and depending on that, you might get to go home."

"This is ridiculous…"

"I know, spending the romantic holiday of the year in the hospital can be sad, but cheer up. Maybe you'll get some visitors to brighten your stay!"

Bakura was not enthused by the suggestion. The doctor turned then to address Ryou, who seemed to be a guardian of some sort. He then was struck by a sudden inspiration.

"Hey, wait a minute, are you two twins?"

Ryou shook his head.

"No, we aren't very much alike at all."

"Hmm…that's an interesting answer. Oh well. You both certainly look alike. Must be a popular hair style…"

The doctor tapped nonchalantly on his clipboard with the attached pen. Bakura shuffled, angrily smoothing the bed covers. The doctor suddenly straightened up and started walking out of the room.

"You'll feel better in no time. Don't worry. And if you need anything, just buzz for a nurse."

With that, he closed the door, leaving the twins alone.

"What a freaking idiot."

"Bakura…"

"Seriously. Have you any clue the crap that came spewing from his mouth?"

"He was just trying to help."

"I don't need any help. I want out of here."

"Bakura. You're sick."

"I wouldn't be sick if it weren't for that damn snowman."

"I already said I was sorry for that."

"Six feet tall! Six feet! Who wants a life-size snowman?"

Bakura started coughing then, sounding as though something was rattling inside of him. Ryou grimaced. It wasn't pleasant that Bakura became more irritable whenever he got sick, but it was less pleasant to have him sick at all.

He abruptly stopped coughing, wiping the side of his mouth on his arm, and then his arm on his bed covers. Ryou stood and walked over to a service tray which held a plastic pitcher of ice water and poured a fresh cup. He handed it to Bakura, who took it, but midway to his mouth, stopped.

"Are you leaving soon?"

"Probably. I wanted to do some grocery shopping."

Ryou watched as Bakura began drinking the water in large gulps. He drank water like he ate steak…in amounts that are certainly not bite-size…

Bakura finished off the cup and set it down beside him.

"And you're going home after that?"

Ryou nodded.

"Yeah."

Bakura scratched his shoulder, zoning out slightly as Ryou stood by the door. He wondered if it would be alright to leave Bakura alone in this place.

The door opened and was quickly overtaken by a large woman dressed in a blue fabric covered with baby ducks. She nearly knocked Ryou into the wall as she entered. Overly cheerful and under-ly sensitive, she filled the room with her own brand of boisterous helium. She saluted both of the room's occupants with a loud hello as she carried in a tray from a larger food cart in the hall.

As soon as she entered, she analyzed Ryou with a critical look and pushed past him towards Bakura. It was he that she addressed.

"Hello Baby-cakes, you feeling better today?"

She took the immense look of irritation as a no. She then proceeded to give a discouraging look around the room, before uttering a squawk-like noise. She set the tray she was holding down and picked up another older one sitting dejected in the corner.

"What! You hardly touched anything on this plate!"

Bakura grumbled.

"I didn't want anything."

"Well, you've got to eat!"

Ryou silently watched the spectacle unfold as the woman babied Bakura. Once she'd positioned the food tray on a pivoting stand connected to the bed, she continued to de-lid all the dishes, revealing a bounty of soft, easy to swallow foods; none of which Bakura would have touched if he had to.

It didn't help that she named the foods as she opened the containers.

"Mashed potatoes…broccoli soup…and green Jello! Perfect for a strong growing boy like yourself."

After she spoke, she noticed the empty cup sitting beside him. She snatched at it, pinning it beneath her arm. She turned and walked to replace the cup at its station, sending another withering look at Ryou. She turned to address Bakura again.

"Will that be all, sugar?"

Bakura somberly nodded, which made her already cheery levels sky-rocket. She smiled at him and walked over to pat his shoulder, before she exited the room with the older food tray and closed the door behind her. Ryou looked at Bakura who was surveying the sustenance with disgust.

"I hate Jello…"

"I know…"

Ryou returned home early that day. There were relatively no lines in the supermarket. Apparently everyone else was busy doing something romantic, or celebratory, or just by themselves. This worked to his advantage however as he sped through his checkout point and drove home uneventfully.

As he drove, he passed couples walking happily down the sidewalk. He could imagine Bakura suggesting that the world would be better off without a few of them and then playfully tugging at the steering wheel. Ryou smiled at one of the many reasons why he didn't let Bakura drive.

The couples became fewer as he approached his home, further into a suburban area, barely shaded with a few bare trees and a lawn still grey from snowy frost. He parked, gathered his groceries and entered the house, meeting extraordinary silence.

He continued in, pushing the door shut behind him with his leg and walking into the kitchen to put his groceries away. The chairs were all still aligned to the kitchen table. No dishes lay in the sink. No sound but the plastic wrappers of the perishable items he'd just bought disturbed the house. It was immensely lonely.

He reached into his brown paper bags and fished out the bread and cheese and chocolate he'd bought at the grocery store. Ordinarily he didn't buy chocolate, but since it was Valentine's Day, the sheer quantity of it was hard to avoid. Plus, it wasn't hard to coerce him to buy chocolate. After all, it was one of his worst (or best) weaknesses.

It was one of Bakura's also.

Ryou finished placing things in cupboards and turned to look around the house. It wasn't often that he actually felt he needed to find something to do. More than most of the time, he had someone to play off of and to keep in check. Now, he was coming up with nothing.

Better something simple than menial.

He tried to think of things he hadn't done. Things that would also be enjoyable that he hadn't done. Things that were completely possible to complete in the space of time he had at his disposal that were also enjoyable and that he hadn't done. That didn't leave much.

He remembered a book he'd read for school a year or two ago. It was some horrible project for a terrible teacher whom he never liked much. The project however gave him the excuse to do a report on a genre he never bothered reading before. Thus, a romantic adventure novel was not something that most teachers found on their book report stack.

"I never finished that book…did I?"

He wondered out loud, walking as he did to where he thought the book was. A small shelf tacked up in a sunny, adjacent sitting room didn't hold it. Nor was it to be found in the living room. Ryou searched his entire bedroom, still finding nothing but a sock cleverly hiding under his bed. Faced with the dilemma of a missing book and the missing double to his newly discovered sock, he felt a little worried if he'd misplaced anything else.

He turned to leave his room, setting the sock on his bed, and was confronted with the other side of the hall. On the other side of the hall was Bakura's room. Bakura didn't like for other people to enter his room. He made an effort of telling Ryou so with a death threat that was only half backed up (Ryou wasn't sure what the other half was). Nonetheless, it was the only room Ryou hadn't checked. And he really did want to finish that book…

So of course he walked up to it.

The door was unlocked. Ryou let it open by itself just in case there was some sort of horrible trap waiting for unwanted interlopers. None appeared to have been triggered, so Ryou stepped forward and turned on the light. He was surprised.

There was relatively little in Bakura's room. Actually, strike that, almost nothing. The walls were bare, except the unflashy coat of paint. There were no curtains on the windows. There was no furniture other than the bed. Even the bed seemed lacking in detail, since it had been almost meticulously made. It was an almost empty room.

Except…

Ryou hadn't explored it yet. And he didn't have any proof that his book wasn't in this room. So, he started looking, although there wasn't much of a big search. The only real hiding places were the closet and underneath Bakura's bed. He started with the closet, figuring it to take longer.

Surprisingly again, there were only two or three pairs of clothes, suspended simply from wire hangers. Ryou closed the door and turned to the bed. He slowly got down on his hands and knees to peer under it and widened his eyes to find, amazingly, his book. He reached for it, pulling it out from under the darkness. It didn't seem dusty at all.

His bookmark was still poking out from the top of the pages. Ryou opened to the spot and scanned the section, furrowing a little. He didn't recognize the section or anything about it. He glanced at the page number, surprised to find it to be twice what he remembered having read to. He closed the book, before turning to the first page again, starting to read.

Before long, he sat down on Bakura's bed, still reading. Not long after that, he stretched out on Bakura's bed still reading. Still not long after that, he dozed off on Bakura's bed, the book snugly marked between his fingers.

Ryou wondered why he felt so uncomfortable. He looked at himself and was shocked to realize that he was in a hospital gown. He looked around and Bakura was standing beside him, staring at him, holding an adventure novel. Bakura was dressed completely normally. He spoke.

"You're sick now too?"

Ryou was still a little confused.

"Sick? Why aren't you in bed too?"

"Because you're sitting in the bed. What a stupid question."

Bakura scoffed and looked at the ceiling, crumpling the pages of the novel back. Ryou looked at him more closely.

"Bakura…"

"What?"

"Are you wearing a locket?"

"Yeah. Why?"

"When did you get a locket?"

Bakura smiled mischievously.

"Well, it is Valentine's Day after all."

"What? Someone gave it to you?"

"No, I bought it for myself, idiot."

Bakura played with the silver locket, sliding it up and down the matching silver chain suspended around his neck. Ryou puzzled.

"But…who gave it to you?"

Bakura looked at him strangely.

"You don't remember?"

Ryou shook his head.

"No…why should I?"

"Because you-"

Suddenly the doctor and the cheery nurse burst into the room, bringing with them guns and party balloons. They began shouting.

"It's your birthday! It's your birthday! Make a wish! Make a wish!"

The cheery nurse then began shooting the balloons with her gun, which turned out to be full of mashed potatoes.

Ryou was completely stunned at this sudden announcement and even more stunned as the intercom system began playing a birthday tune for him. He looked to Bakura for guidance as to what was going on, but found he had vanished. He looked around, searching desperately, but seeing nothing as the people kept getting louder and the intercom kept growing more scratchy and the room kept growing hazier…

Ryou woke startled at the sound of a phone. He moved his head off of his arm and looked around, noticing that night had fallen through the windows. He reached in his pocket for his cell phone which beeped happily away to its ringtone. He didn't instantly recognize the number listed.

"Hello?"

"Hello? Bakura?"

"Oh…hey Yugi…how are you doing?"

"I'm alright. How are you? You sound tired."

"I'm fine. I actually just woke up a second ago…"

"Oh! Sorry, did I wake you up?"

"Sort of…anyway, what's up?"

"Nothing much. I haven't heard from you in a while, so I thought I'd call to see how things were."

"Um…"

There was a pause.

"Bakura?"

"Oh, yeah?"

"Is something wrong?"

"Oh…no, not really…"

Ryou looked around again and realized the empty room he was sitting in, talking on the phone in, was Bakura's. He stood up and quickly smoothed at the bed covers, reminding himself he'd come back later to fix them. He left the book sitting on the bed as he began walking out of the room. He then turned the light off and closed the door behind him.

Yugi continued talking.

"Are you sure? You sound a little distracted."

"It's probably just…I don't know. I'm fine though. Really."

"Alright then, if you're sure. So, I also wanted to call and ask you whether you'd gotten the chance to write down that recipe…you know, the one with the tilapia and the…"

"Oh, right. Right. No, not yet. I can do that now if you'd like though…"

"That'd be great…Grandpa and I at the shop could really use some help in the kitchen!"

He laughed and Ryou laughed a little with him. He went on.

"But, whenever you have time, you can drop it by the shop or something."

"I'll do that tomorrow if I have time, since I'll be out anyway."

"Really? Thanks a lot! Not all of us are great cooks, so any help is a big help."

"You're welcome…"

"Oh, and Bakura…"

"Yes?"

Yugi's voice became a tad softer and sounded somewhat more sensitive.

"If you ever want to come by, we'd be glad to have you over."

"Thanks. I'll remember that."

His voice brightened out again.

"You're welcome! Anyway, that's all I called for, so I'll expect you soon with that recipe."

"Thanks Yugi. Bye."

"Bye."

Ryou closed his cell phone and let his hand fall to his side. He looked around the house. It was silent, dredged with darkness and lonelier than before. Even Bakura's room didn't seem to want him in it. He closed his eyes and walked to his own room.

He sat down on his bed, resting his face in his hands and thought to himself.

"What an odd dream…"

Parts of it were already fading quickly from his memory, only slightly sticking to the edges of distinction and remaining in focus. He knew there was something odd about it though. He looked around for a piece of paper and a pen to scribble down the recipe for Yugi, but upon seeing none in sight, decided to bother with it tomorrow.

He stretched out on his own bed, placing his phone on his bedside table and crossing his arms behind his head. He crossed his ankles after that and succumbed to the lingering effects of sleep. He rarely slept fitfully, but he did that night. The sock he'd found certainly didn't help.

The next morning, Bakura was in a mood as delightful as he was the day before. In fact, the utter chipper-ness that rang through his voice could have set Shirley Temple off tap-dancing. Sadly, it didn't have that effect on most people.

Ryou sat in the hospital room waiting for the verdict as to whether or not Bakura would be allowed to return home that day. It seemed rather obligatory for Ryou to be there. Otherwise, it wouldn't be too unheard of for Bakura to somehow escape. He was rather sneaky after all.

The patient in question was doing nothing to encourage a longer stay. He would have been dressed, ready to go, had they given him his clothes back.

"To think…they blackmail sick people into staying in these awful places by refusing to give them decent clothing!"

Ryou mused.

"They have to get them to stay somehow…"

"That's no excuse. These wretched people…I would send them straight to the shadow realm if-"

"Bakura!"

"Oh, get over it. You know as well as I do I can't condemn people's minds to everlasting torture anymore. At least…not that way…"

Ryou sighed. Bakura picked up on it.

"What's your issue?"

"Nothing."

"You've been sighing like some stupid teenager the entire time you've been here."

"I am a teenager."

"Hardly. You practically hobble around most of the time, you act so old."

"I have to act adult."

"Adult isn't the right word."

"And why not?"

"Because you aren't an adult."

"It's worth trying to be one sometimes…"

"Ha."

Bakura cracked his neck from side to side, closing his eyes as he did so. Ryou sighed again, looking at the door, wishing that-

The doctor entered suddenly, causing the door to bang into the doorstopper behind it. He paid no notice and started talking immediately.

"Wonderful news! You seem cleared up enough to head on home!"

"Hooray. Now give me back my clothes."

"Bakura."

The doctor seemed almost about to do a little dance. It must have been Bakura's delightful atmosphere.

"We'll have you ready to leave in no time! There are just a few forms to sign on your way out that I'll send to you with your wardrobe! Have a lovely rest of the day. Oh, and…"

He stopped and stooped over closer to Bakura, holding his hand to one side of his face, and hushing his breath as though someone were listening in.

"It might not be too late to go on that Valentine's Date with that special someone."

A look of utter horror crossed Bakura's face as the doctor smiled and propelled himself from the room, the door whirling shut behind him. Ryou looked at Bakura. Bakura looked at Ryou.

"Hey…when I get my clothes back, stay in here. I'm afraid that guy will be watching me…"

"Can do."

A nurse entered about ten minutes later with a small stack of papers pinned to a clipboard, and a small bundle of clothes. It was a different nurse this time, one who was less chatty and more stressed looking.

"This is Mr. Bakura's room?"

Ryou opened his mouth a little before nodding.

"Yes."

"Here. Have a nice day."

She passed off the items to Ryou, who had stood up to take them, and then she left the room. Ryou turned to hand the clothes to Bakura who was all too eager to swap garb.

While Bakura was dressing, Ryou turned his chair to address the paperwork. It seemed rather routine, but with a few questions that he wondered about. One of the first was the name of the person filling out the form and their relationship to the patient. Ryou looked at it sternly, filling out the information, and hesitating before writing "guardian" in the relationship slot.

He could hear short rustlings behind him of Bakura getting dressed. He continued filling out the paperwork, quickly and efficiently blackening three forms in only a few minutes. The fourth and last form was the strangest and the shortest. It was an odd little slip of paper that read

"How Did We Do?"

At the top and proceeded to list several questions about the quality of the service during the hospitalization. Ryou looked at it with utter confusion, but before he could turn around to ask Bakura about it, a hand trailed over his right shoulder and down his waist. Bakura's head appeared at his other shoulder, looking at the form.

"At the bottom, you should write that I was terrified of being molested by the over-friendly staff."

"Bakura!"

Ryou shrank away from his head as Bakura laughed.

"Nah. They've probably already gotten too many complaints. No point in bothering them with another."

Ryou sighed, scribbling something complimentary and gratuitous to appease the final form. He then stood to find Bakura staring at him.

"What?"

"You did it again."

"What?"

"Seriously, what is the deal?"

"_What?_ What are you talking about?"

Bakura growled.

"Forget it."

He then walked out of the room. Ryou followed him, wondering what was happening. He dropped the paperwork off at the outgoing desk and took the elevator with Bakura to the bottom floor. Bakura was nearly hopping around on his feet waiting to reach the ground level. More than a few of the other occupants acknowledged the pained sounds he made as the elevator stopped at several floors. The last bleep, however, was one of freedom as Bakura almost ran out of the grey-carpeted foyer and straight to Ryou's car.

Bakura slid into the passenger side and spoke as soon as Ryou had turned the key in the ignition.

"Are we going anywhere?"

Ryou observed him curiously.

"No, you're sick."

Bakura riled back in disgust.

"I am not sick. I'm not in there anymore, am I?"

He stopped to point at the large medical building he'd just escaped from.

"No, but you're still sick."

"Ugh…"

The ride home wasn't filled with much. The radio wasn't playing anything worth listening to. There weren't any love-struck pedestrians that Bakura wanted to become car-struck. Relatively, it was rather boring.

Then Ryou remembered something that had bugged him.

"Hey."

"Hm?"

"Why do you think that doctor was so hung up on you meeting someone for Valentine's Day?"

Bakura looked at him sharply.

"Why should I know?"

"I don't know. I just thought it was weird…like, he knew you had someone or something…"

"He doesn't know anything. He's probably just some creepy pervert that draws cats on his clipboard all day."

"Bakura…"

"It's a hunch."

Another sigh.

"I wish you would stop doing that."

Ryou looked at Bakura.

"Huh?"

"What?"

"Wish I would stop doing what?"

"You know very well what."

Ryou slightly thumped the steering wheel with his hand.

"Bakura, I don't know what you're talking about."

"That's not a big stretch."

Ryou furrowed.

"There's no reason to go there."

"I have every reason to go there."

"Bakura…"

"Don't you even try your reasoning crap."

Bakura turned away to stare out the window at that point. The scenery went by unattended. Ryou continued.

"Bakura…"

"What?"

"What's the matter?"

Bakura whipped his head around and started shouting.

"Why the hell should there be anything the matter! I am perfectly fine and everything is damn peachy! Now would you kindly just shut up and drive home?"

He breathed hard for a moment and Ryou kept his eyes on the road. Bakura frowned before slumping down in his seat and returned to staring out the window. Ryou didn't say anything else and the silence was a sore between them.

They arrived home shortly afterwards. They both entered the house and went in opposite directions. Ryou took a few steps from the door into the living room, which had no walls blocking it off. Bakura went off in the direction of his bedroom.

Ryou stood in the living room, still, trying with great difficulty to suppress the anxiety that was growing inside of him. He took a long deep breath and let it out in a long deep sigh. He would get through this. He was fine. He was perfectly alright. He could handle everyth-

Horrible noise erupted from down the hall. A door slammed open with force that could have put a hole in the wall. Suddenly, Ryou saw Bakura storming down the hallway, bringing fury burning behind him. The voice began bulleting out and up and down Ryou's body.

"What do you think you were doing in my bedroom!"

Ryou was a little frightened, trying to keep calm, realizing he'd forgotten all about fixing Bakura's bedroom.

"Your bedroom?"

"Yes, my bedroom you little rat! What the hell did you think you were doing going inside it?"

"Oh…I was…getting a book…"

"A book?"

"Yes…"

"And this book allowed you perfect reason to enter a place I forbid you to enter?"

Ryou tried to gain ground.

"Bakura, you're going a little overboard."

"Overboard nothing. You defiled my personal room!"

"I didn't defile anything…I might have fallen asleep on your-"

"On my bed! Have you any idea what that means?"

"Bakura-"

"Don't you even dare try that Bakura crap."

"But, Bakura, look, I was only-"

Bakura took a step forward.

"You were only. Only is the operative word. You were only. You've always been only. You always will be. You know what it means? Only. Alone. Forsaken. Given up. You have nothing but the face you hide behind!"

"Bakura, please, this isn't-"

"Pathetic bastard! You deserve to be alone, alone in the darkest pits of despair you can find for yourself. You've always been one to take yourself out of the game, trying to protect yourself, but you have no idea how disgusting you are! Insolent, incessant little brat! I know far well and above who and what you are and what you want and have always wanted!"

"Please, just stop before-"

"Before what? Before you find a family? Before you actually find someone you can love? So you can be loved? Feh. Loneliness is a scar and one that's ripped you from top to bottom. You will always be alone. That's a curse I am so happy to remind you of. Remember it and let it remind you just how insignificant you actually are."

What that, Bakura stormed his way back out of the room and down the hall. His door slammed with that same great force, this time sending trembles through the floor.

Ryou stood there, shaking, cold, alone, before slowly walking towards the front door. He exited the house nerveless and numb, unable to feel himself walking, but knowing slightly where he was going.

The day wasn't very hot, but sunny, and no one could see who he really was in this light.

After a few minutes, Bakura's door opened. He cautiously stepped out and looked around, hoping for any sign of noise or of person. His face was carefully lined with anything he could be prepared for. There was nothing but silence to greet him.

As he walked, Ryou's vision melted away from him, replaced by urgency. He was fixed on moving, on finding a way past his inhibitions, bypassing the very things that anchored him to reality: silence and repression. Parts of him were unlocking, things he needed to allow out.

There was no time for tears, none for anger, none for regret. He had to get where he was going.

The sidewalk presented, square by square, a journey and an opportunity to reach the end. It was like a board game. It was like a wide tight ribbon. It was a bare boundary to walk.

And he walked.

The Turtle Game Shop appeared in view quicker than expected and Ryou found himself more burdened than relieved the closer he got to it. The cobblestone pattern at its front door seemed welcoming, as did the bright colors of its exterior. Before he could stop himself, Ryou walked into the store.

He immediately saw Solomon Mutou, who was seated behind the shop cash register, and who recognized him almost as immediately.

"Why, Bakura! I haven't seen you for ages!"

"I know…"

"Hahaha, it's so good to see you. It just finishes my day perfectly. I tell you, the last two days have been crazy, which I'm quite thankful for. We've sold so many blank puzzles and relationship games and all sorts of things. It's been great for business, but it sure can take a lot out of an old man."

"I'm sure…"

At this point, the old man actually took a good look at Ryou and startled.

"Good gracious Bakura! You look as though you've seen a ghost!"

"No ghost, don't worry. Is Yugi around?"

"Oh, yes, he is. Let me get him for you."

He shuffled out from behind the counter and entered the back door, which led to the rest of the adjoining house. Within a few moments, one spiky headed teen came bounding through the door. He, however, noticed much quicker than his grandfather that something was off.

"Woah, Bakura, you don't look good. Did something happen?"

"Um…Yugi, can I talk to you?"

Yugi blinked.

"Oh, yeah, of course. Come upstairs to my room where we can have some privacy."

He cast a wary eye at his grandfather, who had a bad habit of listening in to young people's gossip. The pair went upstairs and quickly settled well enough on bed and chair respectively. Yugi spoke first.

"So…what's up?"

Ryou was slow to speak.

"Oh…um…nothing much…"

"Huh?"

Yugi looked at him curiously.

"Well, Bakura, that's not what I was expecting…"

"Oh…well…"

Ryou sat in pained silence, trying to find some way out of his walls.

"Bakura, is there something wrong?"

"Mm…"

"It's alright if you don't want to tell me…"

Ryou breathed, the opportunity seizing his soul.

"Yugi…I'm going to tell you now that nothing I'm about to say may make any sense…"

The one sitting on the bed shrugged.

"That's alright."

Ryou continued.

"It may also be something that could bother you…"

Yugi's face grew more concentrated.

"Bakura. Whatever it is, I don't know if I can help, but I can at least listen."

"Okay then…"

Yugi waited while Ryou tried to start.

"Um…I've been having some problems with my dark side…"

Yugi flinched, instantly looking more serious.

"Bakura, is he back to how he-?"

"Oh, no! Nothing like that…it's different than that…"

"Oh, okay…so…what is it…?"

Ryou shifted a little, moving his eyes from one part of the floor to another. He eventually came to no easy conclusion and continued.

"I…well…started to…like him."

The silence returned for a moment as Yugi stared at Ryou, who resumed shifting uncomfortably.

"So…like him as in gotten used to him…or…"

"No…like him as in…um…having affections for him…"

"Oh…"

Ryou looked up, searching Yugi for any signs of condemnation, anything that could allow him to shut down and stop pulling all of this out of himself. He saw no such thing, only a look of concern. It was easier then, once it was out in the open.

"I…guess it sounds a little weird…"

Yugi shook his head.

"No, I don't think so…at least, not too weird. I mean, he is another person after all…and I guess it could happen…"

Yugi thought of his other self, quite happy that he had sent him out for groceries and was not here to participate in the discussion. He kept going.

"But…I guess…I just…what made you even like him in the first place?"

"I…"

Ryou paused to think about it. Nothing concrete formed. Words lifted like dust in his mind. He needed to just exhale and let them say what they would.

"It…didn't just happen overnight…he…well, he was there…he knew how I felt even if he didn't understand it…it was…something for anyone to know how I felt about things…for anyone to be that close…"

He broke off and Yugi picked back up.

"So…what happened…?"

"Nothing really happened…he just kept…being himself…and I never wanted to do anything to change it…I didn't know if I could…"

"So, he doesn't know?"

"No…at least, I don't think he does…"

Yugi stopped, trying to consider some of the questions he wanted to ask. He decided to go ahead.

"Do you think he has any…affections for you?"

Ryou shuddered slightly.

"I don't know…how can he? He doesn't…I don't…doesn't love…"

Yugi's face saddened.

"So…you've been keeping this secret…and…it feels…?"

"Hopeless…"

"Ah…"

"It just…doesn't feel like I'm allowed to fall in love…"

There was a small silence.

"But…you still keep…loving him, don't you…?"

Ryou blinked. Yugi's face was completely serious, attentive. Ryou reflected.

"Yeah…"

He laughed a little, almost to himself, his eyes seeming tired and his soul more than thankful for the lift.

"You'd think I'd have given up, but I just keep…"

He looked down again, but not to avoid anything. Yugi tried to bring the end of the thought out.

"You think then, that maybe…it's not so hopeless after all?"

"I don't know…maybe…"

Ryou smiled a little and they both had laughter in their lungs, but not on their breath. A great burden had gone from Ryou; a part of him always drowning in the quiet knowledge of pain felt relieved. He could feel parts of himself brought up from a sunken darkness he'd tried to forget. It couldn't have been any lighter. At that moment, there was a knock on the door, followed by the slightly edgier than normal voice of Yugi's other half.

"Yugi! This is terrible! Do you realize how expensive these canned sardines are?"

Just a moment passed before Ryou and Yugi looked at each other and burst out laughing. They did not stop laughing even after Yami had entered the room, questioningly holding up the dolorous can of fish. He looked at them for a moment and then quietly left the room. After a minute or two, Ryou spoke, managing it through the gasps for air.

"Do…you think he'll…be alright?"

Yugi attempted an answer.

"Yeah, I think…he'll be fine…"

They stopped laughing and looked at each other. Ryou couldn't help himself.

"Sardines."

And then they started again.

It ended up that Ryou stayed for several hours, rather late into the evening. As it turned out, the Mutou's just so happened to have all the ingredients (plus sardines) for the dish Ryou had intended to write down for Yugi. Rather than be ungracious, he invited them into the kitchen so as they could learn how to make the meal. Although, it took a little coaxing to get a pouting Yami to come help.

Ryou somehow successfully orchestrated the cooking correctly, giving everyone their shot at improving their chef skills without directly opening the hazard of burning down the house. Yugi cut some fruit. Ryou sautéed some onions. Grandpa competently grated cheese and Yami somehow ended up getting covered with flour. The meal was wonderful. Everyone was pleased, especially Solomon, who was therefore quoted as having said,

"Hot momma, no more cardboard!"

No one was positive what that exactly meant, but it managed to carry over even without translation. Everyone talked and laughed, and told stories of days at Duelist Kingdom and when Joey had forgotten not to press the activator button on his duel disk, which launched the hologram monitors into his ceiling. Even Ryou forgot for a little while what had been bothering him, feeling as though he was among family.

Eventually night fell and darkness came with it and Ryou knew he had a ways to walk. As he bid farewell to everyone, Yugi walked him out the door.

"Hey, Bakura."

"Yeah?"

"If you ever need to come over, you're welcome."

"Thank you."

He waved and started walking.

The crisp, smoky night air pooled around him. Ryou crossed his arms, rubbing his hands up and down near his shoulders. The sky was dark with silent clouds.

It was a little while before he finally reached his neighborhood. He was a tad surprised at how far he had walked without noticing, but was relieved to finally be back…

And then, he remembered.

Ryou slowed, but kept walking, rounding the turns with less ease, moving along at a more sluggish pace. He wasn't sure how badly he wanted to go back then. But…he knew he had to.

It wasn't long before he saw his home. It looked different in the dark, with only the casual street light brightening the path. He walked up to the front door, twisted the knob and was surprised to find it still unlocked.

He quietly entered the house, expecting everything from the darkened foyer to leap out at him. Nothing did. He moved further forward and noticed slight noises from the living room. It might have just been from being on edge, but as he shut and locked the door behind him, he could definitely make something out.

He padded forward and saw Bakura asleep on the couch. Slight snores came from him. Ryou looked at him for a moment before heading to his bedroom. He quietly closed the door and went to sleep.

The next morning was brighter than the last. It was the sun that woke Ryou up that morning; not noise, not ruckus, but the sun. He rose to the surface of sleep and broke into the day, a little confused at first that nothing seemed any different. There were dreams laced into reality, but he didn't want to be in one.

He sat, leaning forward and started to gather himself together. He began remembering things from the past day, each coming back a little at a time. As these glimpses kept coming, he walked out of his room, heading first towards the bathroom at the end of the hall to clean up. He walked in, closing the door, and quickly brushed his teeth. By the time he'd finished, he was thoroughly awake.

He wasn't sure how he was to approach this new day. He wasn't sure how this new day was going to follow up to the one that had just preceded it. And he definitely wasn't sure how he was going to get through it, but whatever happened was going to happen in the future and he had other things to do just then. Having forgotten a change of clothes for the shower, he began walking towards his room again. But he didn't get very far.

Standing in the living room, waiting for him, was Bakura. And he did not look happy.

"Where were you last night?"

Ryou had stopped halfway in the hall.

"What?"

"Where were you last night?"

Bakura added special emphasis on every word.

"Why do you want to know?"

"Where were you?"

Ryou sighed.

"…I was at Yugi's house."

"Yugi?"

"Yes. Yugi."

"And what did you do while you were over there?"

Ryou looked at Bakura with bewilderment.

"Why do you care?"

Bakura stopped for a moment, a little surprised at the question.

"That's none of your concern. Now answer my question."

"No. Answer my question. Why do you even care what I do?"

"My reasons are my reasons."

Ryou gave him a hard look and turned to continue getting a change of clothes.

"Fine."

"You slept with him?"

Ryou halted and turned.

"What?"

Bakura looked grim, unmistakably upset for whatever reason.

"You heard me."

"What on earth gave you that idea?"

"Well, princess, you were so eager to take a shower, what else might you have done?"

Ryou felt something very brittle inside of him break.

"And what if I did? What should it matter to you? I can't go over to a friend's house to speak about what's been making me hurt so much for so long without being suspected of sleeping with him?"

Bakura deepened.

"What precisely did you talk about?"

Ryou constricted.

"You."

"_What?_"

"You. I talked about you. Everything. What I was thinking and what I've been feeling about you."

Ryou was treading a dangerous line then between breaking and losing himself to a hard bitterness. Bakura prodded the line with artificial insensitivity.

"And he managed to listen to your whining?"

"Yes. He did. Because he's my friend."

Bakura widened his eyes, before turning away.

"Feh. You think I like bothering with that crap? Friendship is nothing but a useful little delusion you use to do and get what you want. It doesn't last. It wasn't meant to. None of them do, especially not any that matter. It's always the ones that believe the most in friendship that have the least idea how stupid it actually-"

"Stop it!"

Ryou's walls fell. The line broke.

"I don't want to hear anymore! Nothing you say is true! Nothing about you is! I don't know how I'm supposed to act around you when nothing I do or say or think or feel makes any sense to you! Most of the time it doesn't make any sense to me, but I keep going because it's the only thing I have. It's alright for you when you don't have to feel anything, but others actually feel things like friendship and some of us fall in love…"

Bakura was taken off guard, but he stumbled over the end.

"Love? …What good is that?"

Ryou didn't answer. He was too busy watching Bakura's face and trying to keep his own together. He wasn't succeeding very well. All at once, from pinpricks of water, he began crying. With the release, all things lost meaning.

Bakura stood more stunned than he should have. The same look of horror filled his face as Ryou completely broke down. He wasn't sure what to do. He wasn't sure if he could fix it. He knew for once, he'd gone too far.

Ryou couldn't see anymore through his tears. They were coming too quickly, too strongly to allow him time to think. It was one thing to purge pain through tears, but another to begin losing yourself in them. It was a threat to all that solidified his being, that once all that he kept bottled up had poured away, there'd be nothing left…and he was powerless to avoid it.

So, of course, he couldn't have resisted when Bakura walked right up to him and put his arms around him.

"He always calms down when I touch him…" Bakura thought as he tried looping his arms even tighter around Ryou's back. Ryou, in return, loosened his muscles and completely went limp, leaning into it. And miraculously, the tears began to lessen and Ryou began to regain control.

Can a sense of self reform? In the seconds after, all that Ryou thought he knew to be himself pulled away. A new tide of safety rushed back to him and covered him over in warm, breaking waters.

"I'm sorry."

Bakura mumbled it. He wondered if it would have any effect at all. But then, Ryou moved his arms around Bakura's shoulders. They didn't move from that spot for several minutes. It was worth it just to prove that it was actually real. Eventually, Ryou said something.

"Bakura…I like you…"

"Good."

Ryou blinked.

"What?"

"I thought I'd never get the chance to say the same…"

They stayed there a little longer.

"…But you hated…"

"I hated love, not you."

"But…"

"I stole that book because you said I ought to read it one day."

Ryou pulled away to look at Bakura who seemed perfectly and horrendously ashamed.

"I thought you'd realize something if you saw it…"

Something occurred to Ryou.

"Did you actually know if you lov-"

"It didn't make sense to me. Still doesn't. But, this feels better than yelling at you."

Ryou pulled Bakura towards him, burying his face in Bakura's shirt. He mumbled something. Bakura nudged him.

"What?"

Ryou retracted and looked up at him.

"I said, you stupid, stupid, ass."

Ryou then pushed his lips right onto Bakura's, for the moment it takes to realize that nothing will ever be the same again. They both looked at each other. Ryou said,

"Let's go make up for Valentine's Day."

A/N:

Another Tendershipping fic…one I wasn't actually sure whether I'd get to write or not. Sometimes I'll have ideas that I like, but they never really materialize or flesh out enough to get written, so when those sorts of ideas do end up getting written, I'm very happy.

I think I wanted to write something romantic, with a darker sort of tinge to it, since I rarely ever do that sort of thing. That and maybe a more in depth look at what their relationship might be like. I hope it worked out well enough.

Also, it's up to you whether or not I put any Puzzleshipping in here.

Anyway, review please! Thanks!


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